Wednesday, December 7, 2011

making a list

I'm not a good finisher.  I leave things undone.  My bachelor's degree being probably the biggest thing I've left undone.  Two units.  That's it.  And in ridiculous things.  But that's another story.

I find myself not wanting to end this well.  I find myself looking at the future.  The horizon.  6 months from now.  9 months from now.  A year.  I see good things there.  And I want to focus my attention there.  All of it.

There are details to be done now.  Things that are hard.  Things that I am really really good at avoiding.  Really good.  But to get where I'm headed, I have to do the hard part.

I have to remind myself that it can't be worse than it is now.  Maybe like a shot.  It stings for a second, but it's for my own good?  It may be hard and ugly.  But it already is.  To get to the good part down the road, it might sting a little.

So today I will make a list of what needs to be done to finish well.  Making the list seems overwhelming in an of itself.  But I've come to far to not finish well.

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